Looking at the 12 steps as homework assignments to complete,
or a to do list I check off as I go
is certainly how I thought of the process early on.
Over time I considered them to be steps of awareness I developed,
as that more accurately described my experience.
I used to be so focused on the “doing” part of the steps,
which is necessary, but it’s the “being” and “living” aspects
that demonstrate these progressions of awareness.
We are human beings, not human doings.
Each awareness is written with its own suggestion
followed by rewards common amongst many of us.
This list of rewards is by no means comprehensive,
and their true gift is not in the acquiring,
but in how we allow them to impact and change our perception.
Our choices and actions that follow are the rewards,
not just for self but for others as well.
It’s the best form of service we can do in early recovery.
The suggestions and rewards are the results of a process,
not a single event or experience.
Instant gratification creates consequence,
patience and effort reveal opportunities.
The process of recovery does for me slowly,
what the substances did for me quickly.
Let go of control and ego.
Discover honesty and willingness.
No one is taking control away from you
nor is anyone taking over control.
Surrender is an attitude,
a mindset from which we all must begin.
It is a decision only you can make.
No one can surrender for you,
or even tell you how.
True surrender is never contingent
on circumstance, situation, or consequence.
The only way to hit bottom is to stop digging.
Let go of the metaphorical shovel,
reach out and accept the help
necessary to get out of whatever hole you dug.
Absolutely no one gets out alone!
If I am my problem, then you are my solution.
We learn to treat ourselves kindly, by practicing on others.
We learn to be patient with ourselves, by practicing on others.
We learn how to forgive ourselves, by practicing on others.
We learn how to love ourselves, by practicing on others.
Addiction = Isolation
Recovery = Connection
If left to my own devices
I will always choose to remain in a familiar pain,
rather than face the fear of change.
Let go of cynicism, prejudice, and judgement
Discover hope and open mindedness
Addiction is not a fickle lover; it will fuck anyone.
It does not care about our station in life,
socioeconomic status, race, religion
or whatever else our ego uses
to keep us separate, different, and apart from one another.
Identification from one addict to another is the foundation of all recovery.
Our common ground is not in the people, places, and things of our lives.
It’s not even in what we used, no matter how much or how often we used it.
The mutual understandings we experience exist in the emotions we all go through.
These emotions are unexplainable and indescribable to anyone who has not had the same struggles.
Addiction (and recovery)
cannot be learned of intellectually.
It must be experiential.
When one addict gets honest with another,
identification happens almost instantly.
By the end of my first meeting,
I knew those people had felt exactly
how broken and hopeless I felt in that moment.
I could also plainly see they didn’t feel that way any longer
and I wanted to know how they did it.
Look for the similarities rather than the differences.
Begin to practice the art of remaining teachable.
Always reserve your right to be wrong and to change your mind.
Let go of resentment, fear and shame
Discover humility and forgiveness, of self and others
Personal inventory and the amends process are required for this awareness.
The rocket science of recovery is emotional, not intellectual.
Don’t over think it.
You're already gonna over feel it.
It soon becomes your responsibility to
offer encouragement and share your experience with others.
You are to help the next person build their bridge.
Guide the perception, not the person.
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